Thursday, March 21, 2013

Patience is a Virtue

Sometimes I get a little antsy waiting for things to happen gradually, and I find myself wishing that they just happened instantly. Have you ever cut your hair too short and felt like you would actually empty your entire wallet for the person that could immediately put it back to the length you really want? But you can't do that. You just have to wait. (Or buy a wig.)

So I started thinking of some other things that I get tired of waiting for, and wondered what would happen if those things happened instantly. Each one has some pros and cons.

- Season Changes: Yesterday was the first day of spring. Of course, that statement is complete crap because it in no way felt like the first day of spring. It was freezing and miserable. What if on the first day of each new season it immediately turned to what the season should be?

Pro: No wardrobe confusion--you know when you buy new spring clothes and you're really excited to wear them but can't because it's still 40 degrees? That wouldn't happen! 

Con: No more fall foliage. One of the greatest benefits of a gradual season change is watching the leaves change as summer ends and fall begins. But if this were to happen immediately then the turning of the leaves would become this really weird event where everyone has to go outside at whatever time they're going to change and just stare, waiting for it to happen. While that's much more climactic, I think it's probably better overall that that change is gradual.

- Snow Fall: When I was little I would look at the snow fall totals on TV, then look outside and always be disappointed when only 1 inch of the total 10 inches of snow had fallen. I just wanted all 10 inches of snow and I wanted it now. But what if it really all fell at once?

Pro: The sound effect. How amazing would the noise of 10 inches of snow falling everywhere all at once be? I'm imagining either "bunpphhhh" or "wommphhh." Indisputably, the noise ends in a "ph."

Con: Being outside when this happens. You've seen what happens when people try to knock snow off the roof of their garage and end up avalanching themselves. It looks fun in the "haha I'm so glad that's not me" sense. But that's about it.

- Turning a year older: Aging is something that is more gradual in some than in others, and more gradual during certain time periods than others. But regardless, it has to happen to everyone eventually. So what if each year on your birthday, all the aging you were going to do in that whole year just happened immediately?

Pro: Each year on your birthday, at least one person says, "So....do you feel any older??" And typically you cringe at that question because the answer is always "no" but you still have to come up with something witty or cute to say. If you aged immediately you could finally have an adequate answer to that question.

Con: I think the con here is rather obvious. Aging is something that most people try to avoid, and trick themselves into thinking they have avoided it because they see themselves every day and they don't notice the gradual, subtle signs. Aging 1 whole year in 1 day would not be subtle in any way.

I guess this may be one of those things that's best just staying an idea in my head. The cons probably outweigh the pros. 

Are you tired of waiting for things that you think should just happen immediately? Or is the waiting part what makes it fun? It can be painstaking to find out if your team is going to win the championship...but I'm not sure how awesome it'd be if they just played an entire season in one day.

Maybe some things are worth the wait. Or maybe some things require the wait to be worth anything. Would spring be as great if you didn't have to suffer through all of March to get to it?


"Don't care how, I want it NOWWW!"
-Veruca Salt, Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

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