Musicians/song writers/Kelly Clarkson's of the world know this--and they make sure to make their songs as vague and universally applicable as possible. It's to the point where I feel like I can relate to the majority of the songs currently played on the radio.
But I currently have one giant exception: Matchbox 20's new song "She's So Mean"
There is not a single line in this song that I identify with or agree with.
Here's the music video:
(Ugh, I just watched the video for the first time right now because I thought to myself, "Ok maybe I'll understand it more after I watch" ...nope.)
If you're at work or just feeling too lazy to actually listen to the song, here's the lyrics:
I kn-kn-know a girl, she gets what she wants all the time
'Cause she's fine
But for an angel, she's a hot hot mess
Make you so blind
But you don't mind
'Cause she's an uptown, get-around, anything-goes girl, girl
She's a hardcore, candy-store, gimme-some-more girl, girl
She'll make you take her to the club, but then she leaves with her friends
She likes to stay late at the party, 'cause the fun never ends
And all her clothes are on the floor and all your records are scratched
She's like a one-way ticket 'cause you can't come back!
[Chorus:]
Saying yeah... you want her, but she's so mean
(You’ll never let her go. Why don’t you let her go?)
Yeah... you want her, but she's so mean
(You’ll never let her go. Why don’t you let her go?)
You kn-kn-know that if you don’t shut your mouth, she’ll freak out
You better get your shit together, ‘cause she’s bringing you down now
Yeah boy you better, you better
'Cause she's an uptown, get-around, anything-goes girl, girl
She's a hardcore, candy-store, gimme-some-more girl, girl
She’s got her wicked sense of humor, can’t believe what she says
She drinks Bacardi in the morning ‘til it goes to her head
And all you want is just to hold her, but she don’t go for that
She has a hard time coming when she can’t hit back
[Chorus]
Every now and then, she makes you just a little bit crazy
She’ll turn a knife into your back and then she’s calling you baby, crazy
She'll make you take her to the club, but then she leaves with her friends
She likes to stay late at the party, 'cause the fun never ends
And all her clothes are on the floor and all your records are scratched
She's like a one-way ticket 'cause you can't come back!
[Chorus x2]
To state the obvious...this girl sounds mean. And to disagree with Matchbox 20...she sounds like no one I would want to date, ever. And most of all, she sounds nothing like me. And I don't like songs if they aren't about me. I said that at the beginning of this post right? If it's not about me then the song is no good.
I can barely even spill water on someone's t-shirt without apologizing profusely. If i scratched all their records I think I'd be out buying them a brand new collection.
I hate Bacardi.
I'm not sure what a "hardcore, candy-store, gimme-some-more girl" is, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say I'm probably not one of those.
...Maybe this is why guys don't like me? Or at least why Rob Thomas hasn't returned any of my phone calls. (Previously I assumed he was too busy finding yet another alley or city street on which to film his next single.)
Is it because I don't ruin shit for them? Have I not destroyed enough property or spoiled enough nights out for them? It's usually girls that get all the crap for going after the guys that ruin their lives...but this song indicates that guys sneakily love it too.
What a screwed up species we are.
That's all I gotta say about that (said in a Forrest Gump voice).
Time to go electrocute some hot guys, maybe key a few nice cars and find a new boyfriend!
"Brian...do girls like it when you treat them like crap?"
-Stewie Griffin, Family Guy
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