Awk-wardd

As someone who goes through most of my life feeling awkward, there are many situations that make my skin crawl and my face turn bright red (which my public speaking professor once told me was "unfortunate.") But sometimes when I analyze why I feel awkward or embarrassed at certain times I realize I should have NEVER been the one who felt awkward right then.


Like when you experience collateral embarrassment (sometimes referred to as second-hand embarrassment.) This is when someone you are associated with in some way is doing something really embarrassing and you feel embarrased for them. And really...why? It's pretty clear to everyone involved that you aren't the one committing the embarrassing act. 


I don't have a personal example that can rival the collateral embarrassment felt by Mike Myers in this video with Kanye West: 

If you really want to cut to the chase, tune in around 1:30, but the whole thing is worth watching just for Mike Myers' face. The poor guy is blindsided and feels SO incredibly awkward. And it's not his fault! He's a victim!


Moving on, here's another kind of unnecessary embarrassment I always feel. One week I went to Target 3 times in probably a 5 day span. All 3 times I was there I saw someone I knew. The same person all 3 times. And they weren't an employee. And I left feeling so embarrassed that they saw me at Target 3 times in one week. Until I realized...they were also in Target 3 times in one week. So they should be sharing some of this embarrassment! And who knows, maybe they did.


Now I'll switch back over to someone else's life experience because this story so perfectly exemplifies an unnecessary feeling of awkardness. I was told this story by a friend of a friend who had gone out on a date with a guy, but ended up not being that into him. She avoided his next couple of advances for a second date, and hadn't gotten in touch with him for a couple weeks. She was returning home to her garden level apartment one day when, from afar, she saw the guy she had gone on the date with looking into the window of her apartment! Creepy right? So I asked her what she did when she saw this, and she said "Oh my god I freaked out and booked it to hide behind another building until he went away." This guy was peeping in her windows but SHE felt awkward for interrupting him! She would have had every right to sneak up behind him and say, "WHATCHA DOIN?!" and he would have been the awkward one wishing he had a building to hide behind.


I should really start working on pushing off some of the awkwardness I feel on a daily basis. So much of it is not mine to own...I really need to start delegating (silently and internally of course) some of the awkward.




"No one can make you feel inferior [awkward/embarrassed] without your consent"*
-Eleanor Roosevelt
*quote has been slightly altered to work better with this post. deal with it :)